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The first thing you need to understand is that all of history is a lie. The second is that the truth can be confusing.


By  PHILIP DE WET

It goes something like this. In the beginning there was a universe that contained, at one level, physical matter. Through this physical universe travelled an alien race looking for potentially habitable planets. Nearly four-billion years ago those aliens stumbled across Earth and thought it good, so they started seeding the planet with microscopic life. A billion years or so later they returned with an upgrade package, a process repeated a couple of times, and gradually building up to bigger animals.

Much later, a few hundred thousand years ago, perhaps, a second alien race stumbled across Earth. They also thought it good because it had gold, which they transformed into a magical substance to eat. The newcomer aliens created mankind as slaves to work their mines, perverting a stolen recipe for supermen. Homo sapiens was born.

When they departed, let us say about 4 000 years ago, they left behind a race psychologically broken through abuse, a lot of myths about our origins and a ruling class of humans with access to some of their technologies, such as the ability to move huge stones effortlessly. These humans hid their secrets well and used them to remain in power and develop weapons that could literally be earthshattering, and formed the Illuminati. Then, from 1930 onwards, a third and fourth race of aliens came knocking, one to sell these behind-the-scenes rulers machines for time travel and teleportation, the other (which may or may not be related to the original terraformers) to help free humanity from its shackles. Most recently, just in the last month or two, the good aliens won, using interstellar beams to destroy secret bases via earthquakes, setting us on a path of peace and love and prosperity -- if we choose to have it......continues

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